Funerals needn't be expensive events

By Msgr. Pedro Lopez-Gallo

When it comes to decisions on baptisms, first Communions, marriages, and funerals, the enemy today is money, because each of these sacramental functions is becoming more of an event, involving huge expenses.

For some, a baptism requires finding wealthy or prominent sponsors and a fancy restaurant for the reception. The same goes for first Communions, when little girls are dressed as princesses and boys look like little knights. Extravagant weddings can run into tens of thousands of dollars. Funerals too, can be ultra expensive, a monument to the sorrow and grief of the family wanting the best for their beloved departed.

To avoid the astronomic expenses, many decide: "No baptisms, no first Communions, no weddings, no funerals. It is too costly!"

A reader wrote to The B.C. Catholic newspaper: "I am writing to seek clarification on procedures for a Catholic funeral: if it is possible to have a funeral Mass without the body present in the church. In school we were taught the soul leaves the body soon after death; therefore, in the case of cremation, would it be acceptable to have the ashes present at the church instead of the body?

"[My friend] feels it is rather foolish to rent a casket for $2,000 just to go from the funeral home to the church and then to the crematorium. Could Msgr. Pedro Lopez-Gallo write an article on the subject for The B.C. Catholic."

Dear reader, your letter reminds me of the story of a man who walked into a five-star restaurant and ordered a seven-course meal with wine for his wife and himself. He spent the rest of his life telling everybody never to go out to dinner because it would cost $500 for two!

Intrigued by your question and my concerns about the "cost of dying," I made my own inquiry and gathered some facts worth considering:

• B.C. has the lowest funeral costs in North America.
• Caskets can be as inexpensive as $300.
• Cremation can be done for about $1,200, everything included, even taxes.
• For more formal services, such as having a burial, you will face three major costs: the extra time provided by professional staff, the casket, and the burial plot.
• Cemetery fees, including a plot in a public city cemetery, start at about $2,200. This is a one-time fee for the burial and perpetual cemetery maintenance, not at all a bad deal!

I understand these prices are the absolute minimum; the cost, of course, escalates when people demand more pomp and circumstance, and hire limousines plus musicians and singers. However, selecting your funeral home wisely and choosing options that fit your taste and budget will greatly reduce the cost.

Like weddings, funerals can get out of hand, but only if you, the consumer, let them. Hiring a horse and carriage for a wedding could compete with the cost of a limousine for a funeral. Similarly, if you want a top-of-the-line casket, be prepared to pay $3,000 to $8,000, depending on the wood it is made from. It is your choice. Think about what you need, not what you want.

The conclusion of my inquiries was that a funeral can cost $2,000 for professional fees, $600-$1,000 for a modest casket, $2,500 for a city-owned burial plot, $27 for a death certificate, $25 for the government tax on death, and then, of course, GST (yes, taxes and death are unavoidable).

All this, especially if the funeral has not been pre-paid, can bring serious disputes among the surviving family. I officiated at the funeral of a 90-year-old widow whose family wanted the best, but the lady had no income other than the insignificant old age pension, although her home was in Shaughnessy and valued at $2.5 million.

One agency's service fees of $2,000 includes handling the deceased, storing the body, providing cars, etc., but others charge $4,000 and more for the same services. Many people give the parish an offering of $200 to $400 for the use of the church.

There are two things that I would like to clarify. The first: although it was taught in school that "the soul leaves the body soon after death," it is also true that the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, and that this fragile vessel has been purified by the waters of baptism. That is what the Church wants to honour, just as Mary Magdalene wanted to honour the Body of Christ in the Holy Sepulchre.

The second: the Church does not mind whether the casket is of precious wood or a pine box covered by the pall. What the Church wants in the celebration of a funeral is that the Liturgy must respect the dignity of the human body and the body must be present in the church for the Mass.

Life is a precious gift involving costs: feeding and nurturing your children, paying for schools and hospitals. This was foreseen in the divine economy when God said to Adam, "By the sweat of your brow shall you get bread to eat" (Gen. 3:19).

Msgr. Lopez-Gallo's columns are available in two volumes for $20 each from St. Andrew's Church Supply, 305 W. 8 Ave. in Vancouver, toll-free 1-800-663-7161. Proceeds will go to Hogar de Nazareth Orphanage in Mexico, which he sponsors.