The Church warns against unjust discrimination

By Msgr. Pedro Lopez-Gallo

I have received letters and calls criticizing me for “canonizing” heterosexuals and demonizing homosexuals. Nothing is further from my intention. I only wanted to explain the Vatican’s document prohibiting from entrance to the seminary men with strong attractions to their own sex.

Both heterosexuals and homosexuals are equally children of God: both are God’s creation and both are beloved children of their parents. However we all have inherited original sin, that brings with it the stimulus carnis (Latin term meaning a goad, a sharp-pointed stick used to urge on yoked oxen). In theology it is called concupiscence of the flesh.

This inclination to sex is inborn in all human beings. The Church’s involvement is in telling us how we may use it. Sexual activity is immoral except with one’s married partner. Unfortunately, in our godless society, fewer and fewer subscribe to this belief.

The Church’s teaching is crystal clear: “Homosexual inclination is not a sin: its activity is.” By the same token, “Heterosexual inclination is not a sin, its activity is [outside marriage].”

It is absurd to say the Church discriminates against homosexuals. She teaches, “Gays and lesbians must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided” (Catechism of the Catholic Church, #2357).

A couple came to see me. Their daughter, 16, had written them a letter saying: “Dad, Mum, I want to inform you that I have discovered I am lesbian. I am going to spend this long weekend with Louise, who has taught me the joy of being her lover. I am very happy. I love you. Carla.”

The parents called the police, but were told that Carla was legally able to have sex, since she was older than 14. Her parents were in a state of disbelief, anger, and hatred when they came to see me. The mother blamed her husband for their daughter’s attraction because he was so often absent. He replied: “I want to kill her for the shame she brings on me! I regret having brought her to life!”

I sternly told them, “If you do not treat Carla with love and tenderness you will never see her again. Only love will bring her back to you. Your feelings of frustration must disappear. Accept Carla as she is and, more important, accept the will of God.”

I knew Carla. Years before, I had prepared her for her First Communion, but after she went to high school, I had lost track of her. I was worried, not because Carla was a lesbian, but because she was abdicating her moral principles at so tender an age and in so perverted a way. I mingled my tears with those of her parents. Then we went into the church and, near the tabernacle, I prayed with them:

“O Lord, in Your mysterious ways, You wanted Carla to experience this attraction that is so painful and incomprehensible to us. We leave everything in Your hands and beg You to give us the wisdom, the love, to treat her as a child You have entrusted to us. We firmly believe that she is Your and our daughter.”

Eventually, they were in peace and went home. I assured them I would speak with Carla.

The meeting with her, some days later, promised to be tempestuous and recriminatory on her side. When I entered my office, she was facing the wall; she did not answer my “Good Morning.” Behind her, I began to pray, “Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners....”

She turned to me and, with a deep sigh, mused: “Yes, Father, I am a sinner. I am so unhappy. Last night I wanted to commit suicide; I didn’t have the courage. What will I do? My parents now seem to be nice to me, but I feel that they are hypocrites, hiding their shame and pain.”

“Carla, do you pray?”

She replied: “I still have my rosary from my First Communion. I am so confused. Sometimes I feel that I am the most horrible person, but then I remember that God cannot reject me. Yes, I was stupid to think of eloping with Louise. I do not want to see her anymore. Although at the beginning the pleasure was unbelievable, afterwards the bitterness was more sour every day. We did very repugnant acts. I feel my body is dirty and filthy. It was awful. I do not want to see Louise again.”

Then, as her rancour and sadness started to mellow, she asked me to hear her confession. The seal of confession impedes me from revealing anything more. All I can say is that, today, Carla feels she is perhaps the most beloved child of God. She never misses Sunday Mass. Communion is a real encounter with Jesus.

After some years, she finished her university studies; in her profession she is brilliant. She wrote to me, “Father, although it is not easy, I continue to be chaste, and my union with God is amazingly gratifying. I pray for you always. By the way, my parents are not hypocrites; they are wonderful ... and are practising! Yours, Carla.”

Msgr. Lopez-Gallo’s columns are available in two volumes for $20 each from St. Andrew’s Church Supply, 275 E. 8 Ave., Vancouver, V5T 1R9, or toll-free at 1-800-663-7161. Proceeds will go to Hogar de Nazareth Orphanage in Mexico, which he sponsors.